Why Did God Make Me This Way?

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Two quick thoughts…okay, no…3.
1) Thank God somebody else feels split down the middle on “supralapsarianism” and “infralapsarianism”, even if it is 6:45 in the morning! I mean, refreshing to read that someone who I believe thinks well about Christian doctrine* isn’t dogmatically anchored to either place, though I don’t think ill of those who are committed to one conclusion or the other.
2) Hooray! I’m right there with you that depression sucks, that there are no magic answers for Christians who live with a mental health dx, but that God is RIGHT THERE, hurting alongside us.
3) J.S. Park rocks!

*I don’t agree 100% w/ anyone on all doctrine…including myself 2 years ago. The blessing, &, occasional curse, of my mind, is that it is very changeable. That said, I like a lot of what Park has to say about things, &, not being a contrarian (well…today, anyway), don’t feel the pathological need to lay out any areas where we’re of different perspectives.

J.S. Park: Hospital Chaplain, Skeptical Christian

bluerbluebluesky asked a question:

Hey JS it’s been a while, hope you’re well and congrats on your marriage (and your new books). Please bear with me, it’s weird writing in being removed from Christianity, but you really do seem like a genuine and real guy and I had really appreciated your words before. How do you stay confident in a good God when He has “fearfully and wonderfully” made you with depression? I can’t understand why He’d watch His kids live with chronic unbalanced neurochemicals that make them suicidal. Thanks JS

Hey dear friend, I appreciate your very kind words and I’m thankful for your honest challenging question.

I think there are really two ways to look at this. One is that God created everything in history, including death and disease and disasters, as a big ball of yarn that will one day be un-done by His glory. The other…

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About cathsparks

cathsparks is a 1970 model writer, disability advocate, spouse of 25+ years, and adoptive parent of grown children. She's been creating stories since early childhood, when she wrote her earliest work, "The Dog Who Ate Spaghetti". (Spoiler alert: It's about a dog who---wait for it---eats spaghetti.) Cathy enjoys backroads travel, ethnic cuisine, reading dystopian and mystery fiction, watching classic and documentary film, and doing family history research. Professionally, she's been everything from a small-town waitress, to a youth minister, a hat and handbag saleslady, a licensed early childhood ed director, and even a case manager for kids with Severe Emotional Disturbance. Currently, she writes, consults, does research, and is a city-appointed poll official. Politically an odd duck, she has friends that run the gamut from Socialist to Constitution Party, and nearly everywhere in between. Likewise, Cath has many chums who share her Christian faith, to be sure, but also enjoys meaningful friendships with folks who embrace other paths, including agnostics and atheists. There is no singular Sparks litmus test for fellowship, other than an honest effort at mutual respect. She and her husband, Jason (who was her first kiss, 32+ years ago), live part-time with their oldest, a son---an accomplished artist and Special Olympian attending a special needs college much of the year in the upper Midwest---and several ferocious house-cats. (Over half of them are "grand-kitties", but probably not leaving soon! They also have a "grand-dog" in another state.) This son has art classes and various activities several days a week, lots of friends, and when in Nashville, has been active in community group, and men's Bible study nights (though he skips the suds), retreats, church work days, and more. His sweet sometime girlfriend attends church with him, and they enjoy dining out and double/group outings to the movies. He's developing job and skills at school, majoring in horticulture, and striving for appropriate independence in all these areas and more. He's excited to be in his 1st apartment, going to a church of his choice, going on outings, and preparing for a career, at his college for people with intellectual disabilities.It lies farther North, even, than the homes of either of his siblings. All 3 of cathsparks' and hubsy's kids were raised to travel, and, like their parents, are happy wanderers. Their daughter---a double-majoring college Senior in the Midwest---lives in a beautiful rented house, and is a happy wife and mom via adoption, birth, and foster parenthood to 5 boys in just 3 years. They range from newborn to young adult. She uses her psych coursework working with students struggling with behavioral health issues. She's active in ministry, plays drums, and lived for a semester in Siberian Russia. Her husband is an ordained minister. Between the 2 of them, post-honeymoon, they've been to 9 different countries. and a great many prominent American cities. Cath and Jason enjoy spending time with their grown-up kids, at their small 1940 Tudor revival, in East Nashville's Inglewood neighborhood, during holidays and school breaks. Their youngest and his bride live in a nearby Southern state, where they moved recently. He's taken classes, driven a forklift, and built a steady career in middle management, at a company where he's enjoyed the respect and appreciation of those who worked with him. We're sure he'll be motivated to be successful, wherever he roams, because he has 5 motivating factors. The youngest couple in the family have 2 girls and 2 boys, from ages 1-4, who Grammy and Gramps adore, and miss. That makes a total of 9 human grandkids, ages newborn to 18. Back in Nashville, Cath, Jason, and their oldest son attend Restoration, a diverse, loving body of believers who accept them, flaws and all. They are sin-prone, messy creatures, living in a temperamental 80-year old Tudor cottage with too many books, lots of iced tea, and their maximum number of felines.

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